Today I went to visit a friend at her house for the first time. So what? No big deal. Not exactly headline making news I know but it for me it was a whole new experience.
In the past going to someone’s house filled me with anxiety, made me nervous and left me feeling awkward and on edge. And even though they had invited me to make myself at home, I felt like I was intruding into their privacy and could never quite relax and be at ease.
The visit would be so superficial with them trying too hard to be the perfect host and to make witty, engaging conversation and then me doing the same in return so as to be the polite guest. Then there were those dreaded and uncomfortable silences that needed to be filled with something, anything! Just keep talking, for God’s sake think of something to say! Thankfully there was the CD collection, a random book or a framed picture or photograph that would come to the rescue and save the day. Phew! Painful gap in conversation and awkward moment averted.
Funny how we find silence or a break in a conversation so desperately difficult to deal with.
Why is that?
Anyway, back to my visit today…..
What was so different that I wanted to share it with you?
Well, I was greeted by a warm smile and an open heart. Hugged gently, told I was gorgeous and connected to by a friend, who in all honesty up until today I actually didn’t know that well. Not only was I welcomed into her home but into her life and her family. But it went deeper than that she also opened herself up to me and let me in with no barriers allowing me to see and feel all of who she is. I could feel that she is just like me and in return was able to do the same and let the real me out. In that moment we connected deeply and it didn’t matter if there was nothing to say as actually nothing needed to be said.
How refreshing to be with someone and them not need you to be or act in a certain way. How refreshing to be with someone and not feel like you have to entertain them.
How refreshing to be with someone and simply know that you are equal and in that feel totally at home in your own skin.
In that brief 3 hour visit I learnt more about my new friend than I have about people I have known for more than 20 years. The need for small talk dissolved and we were able to go to a level of honesty that takes most friendships many years to reach.
This just goes to show that when we open our hearts to each other and let go the superficial front we put on, magic truly happens.