And So This Is Christmas

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And so this is Christmas and what have we done another year over and a new one just begun?

Life is a never ending continuing cycle and the past is not behind us but lived with us until we heal, change, grow, learn and evolve. Thinking that the strike of midnight on New Years Eve will alter anything is a falsehood of hope that allows us to live irresponsibly in the notion that things will be different. That how we lived the past 12 months, years or lives does not matter, that it is wiped away by the ticking of the clock. This is not the case – how often do situations, events or history have to repeat itself before we admit that unless we change things stay the same. Yes they may be dressed in different clothes, or played out in different relationships, with different people but in essence it is the same scenario over and over until we get it, evolve and alter our quality.

By all means set goals for next year, reflect on this one but get honest about what you need to heal, let go of and resolve otherwise 2017 will just be a repeat of 2016 with a slightly different flavour.

Community

If you look up the definition of community what stands out for me is this line

a group of people living in the same place or having a particular characteristic in common”

It is interesting, how we have taken what is so obviously a Universal all-encompassing meaning and used it to create division and separation based on geography, location, likes and dislikes, shared ideals and beliefs, culture, nationality, level of education, gender, age, social and educational background.

If we were to truly look at this definition and feel it in its wholeness we could never do what the above examples clearly demonstrate, which is to apply reductionism to break community into factions that keep us at arms length based on our small picture outer differences rather than our true commonalities.

For me when I read the definition of community and feel it from what I have lived before, my understanding of community is:

Group of people = Humanity
Living in the same place = Earth
Particular characteristic in common = we are Love, we are all Sons of God

So for me community goes beyond the people who I come into contact with or choose to spend and share time with. Community is all-inclusive and is based on the principles of Brotherhood, Oneness and Equality knowing we are one community living in the same place, sharing the same characteristics.

Who is Hurting Who?

Being in the World can be harsh and challenging, we have all been hurt by someone yet we behave and react like we have been hurt by everyone.

What do I mean by that? Growing up we experience moments and situations in life that are unpleasant and as we are naturally sensitive beings designed to live in harmony with one another this hurts us. It could be that Mom looked at you in a way that wasn’t full of love and adoration, your sibling bullied you, a friend lied or let you down and so forth and hence we get hurt. So to avoid being hurt again we put up defences, guards and walls to keep people at bay or project aggression, being hard and tough so it looks like we will attack first so don’t you dare go there. We must protect ourselves from hurt at any cost. But instead of being this way with the people who we perceived hurt us we are protective and guarded with everybody – just incase.

But what if this protection we think we have is an illusion and that by being anything other than trusting, loving and open we are the ones already hurting ourselves as we are going against our Divine inner nature. What if being hardened and aggressive is a self-perpetuating hurt that we are living in almost every moment of everyday. . .Ouch!

This for me is a very poignant point and a great reminder when I realise I am steeling myself for a meeting, phone call or just going out into the world that the greatest protection I have is to be all of the love that I am. To remind myself I can’t hold the whole world and all of humanity to ransom for a handful of people in my life that hurt me because I needed them to be a certain way, to love me when they couldn’t and to give me what I wasn’t giving myself which was permission to be loving, delicate, tender and understanding.


“The moment you harden to protect yourself from being hurt, your next move is in disregard … you are then hurting yourself.”

~ Esoteric Teachings & Revelations – by Serge Benhayon
Pg. 469

So at the end of the day who really is hurting who?

Universal Medicine Retreat Vietnam

March 2016 and I find myself in Vietnam for another consecutive year attending the Universal Medicine Retreat hosted by Serge Benhayon and Natalie Benhayon. This retreat is a 5 day gift that I receive every year along with around 200 students of The Ancient Wisdom.

Now when most of us think about health retreats we have images of hours of yoga, meditations, clean food, massage and spas – well at least I did anyway. However, the retreats by Universal Medicine turn this concept on their head. These retreats are designed to deepen our understanding of who we are and our place not only in life but the whole grand scheme of things in the Universe. Through presentations and workshops which are both challenging, exposing and at the same time enlightening we get to explore the hinderances and games that we play to not live in full knowing that we are more than flesh and blood and come from Divinity.

The days start at 5am through to 6.30pm and are punctuated by the most delicious food served overlooking the resort gardens, pool and river, time for walks and esoteric yoga twice a day – which is not all standing on your head, poses or strange breathing exercises but a time to connect to the body and the quality we have within.

Serge Benhayon holds no punches during these retreats where he presents how he lives and his deep wisdom and connection to the intelligence of the Universe – so as to reawaken us to the fact that we too are Divine beings living in a way where we have forgotten and repressed who we are to fit in to a societal norm that is anything but normal to the way we are to truly be.

These retreats are transformational and life changing in a way that grows and develops by ones own commitment to self develop, explore and put into place a Way of Livingness that supports you to be more deeply connected to and able to live who you are.

So why many of my friends ask do I keep coming back year after year? Well the answer to that is there is a deeper level of me to go to, more to understand about myself and my place in the world and a deeper quality of love and Divinity to evolve to. Attending these retreats support me and my family to do just that through the inspiration of Serge Benhayon, his family, my friends and all the students of Universal Medicine. And to put it quite simply its also a lot of fun!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Life Changed When I Met Serge Benhayon

Throughout my life I have always felt that things didn’t quite add up, that there had to be more to it than you are born, you live, you die and that’s it. It seems to me to be a whole lot of effort to put in if that’s all there is.

As a young child I felt very connected to all that was around me, sensitive to what I felt or sensed and knew there was more than only that which I could tangibly touch or experience with my other senses. Life seemed so much grander and more expansive and I loved the feeling of being a part of it all.

Growing older it was like I turned down this ability, as often the harshness of the world was too much to bear and for me it was easier to dull it down with food, sport, studying and being more in my thoughts and less in my feelings. This coping mechanism served me well up to a point, even though I was aware that it wasn’t the answer I invested heavily in it so as to not acknowledge that I was a delicate and fragile soul who knew there was more than meets the eye. In fact I became very good at pretending that life was just what my five senses and my intellect told me, yet the angst and tension of not living what was naturally there as a child gnawed away at me like a termite with a voracious appetite munching through wood.

All the while the tension would surface reminding me that I was so much more than this automaton I had created. To achieve this I would push and drive myself harder at work and in sport, would eat massive volumes of food and drink coffee and alcohol like it was going out of fashion. Yet as time went on it seemed there was nothing I could do to stop that feeling that something wasn’t right, something was missing.

I started to explore this feeling and in this began my quest for answers, for something that would bring relief . . . But everything I tried from yoga to meditation, self-help books and so forth didn’t touch the sides and just left me feeling more lost and furious that the world wasn’t right.

Everything changed when I met Serge Benhayon the founder of Universal Medicine in 2004 at a workshop where he presented about life being all about energy, that we are all more than physical beings and that we are in fact innately Divine. He spoke of things that I knew to be true yet couldn’t quite grasp as first with my mind, but what I felt in my body resonated so strongly I simply had to admit that this was it – And that I had known this all along, that the termite-like gnawing angst was simply a reminder that I wasn’t living true to what I knew.

Through working with Serge Benhayon I have been able to redevelop more of how I was as a child, honouring that I feel very connected to all that is around me, am sensitive to what I feel or sense and know there is more than only that which I can tangibly touch or experience with my other senses.

 Life is so much grander and more expansive and I love the feeling of being a part of it all.

 

Ironic

Isn’t it ironic – you set out to achieve something and when you get there you realise that you have grown and evolved so much as a person that it is no longer what you yearn for. It then takes courage to admit this, take stock and reflect on what is important to you, what you need and what needs to shift or change. This is not a failure, it is simply that you now see your life differently and that what fulfilled you at the outset no longer serves you in the way it once did.

Growth comes from acknowledging that life is not static, it is a constant flow, a movement that brings you back to who you are deep within as you unfold and let go of that which no longer is who you thought you were – the you that shaped what you set out to achieve and the you that reached that point ironically no longer exists as it once did because as you have grown and are now experiencing life from a different perspective. And this feeds an illusion that we have been unable to achieve success or happiness and that we have to strive and drive to get somewhere when in fact it is always inside us all the time just waiting to be connected to and lived in full.

I Was A Closet Guitarist

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6 weeks ago I was a closet guitarist.

I grew up loving music, but was not what I would describe as musical, so rather than being a player I was a listener with 100’s of CD’s, music magazines and attendances at gigs seeing as many bands as I could muster.

I admit I was quite in love with the rock ‘n’ roll lifestyle and in my 20’s played guitar on and off, never progressing very far as I gave up in frustration at trying to teach myself from books and audio CD’s. With guitar lessons a few years later I had gotten the basics down and even passed a couple of music exams but would still have classed myself as a beginner.

Moving to Australia 16 years ago bringing my guitars with me, I never felt compelled to play them and rather than have them languishing in the corner collecting dust I sold them online. And that I believed was that; the end of my rock star aspirations . . . until recently that is.

My son is very musical and by age 6 was having piano and guitar lessons – and well that was it, seeing his enjoyment made me want to play again, so I started having guitar lessons two years ago.

After a 15-year break it was like being a beginner again, yes I remembered some chords and techniques but putting them together required patience and practice and being able to really tune in to my body.

What struck me was I could play the pieces quite well at home yet when it came time to play in my lesson I would be struck with anxiety and would mess it up playing below par, as I was painfully aware if feeling judged by my teacher. I swapped teachers soon after that and now have one who is very supportive and encouraging which has helped me let go of the need to be perfect and hence the anxiety.

Watching Michael Benhayon of Glorious music play has also inspired me. Michael is self-taught, playing in a way that is not about him being the star or wallowing in emotional angst, his music carries depth and meaning and the quality that comes with it that allows you to simply be who you are.

Anyway back to the start of this story . . . 6 weeks ago I was a closet guitarist. I had never played in front of anyone but my family and my teacher and the thought of playing for anyone else brought me out in a heart racing cold sweat. It was time to come out so I attended a local jam session held with a view to form bands that would put on a gig at the end of November.

Now bear in mind this was a huge leap of faith, as I have never played in a band, with other musicians or even standing up!

So I found myself in a bar with a music stage with over 25 complete strangers, who all looked as nervous as I was feeling. When I got chatting to them it was obvious they had way more experience than me and I must admit I was more than a little tense by this point and wondering what I’d let myself in for.

Randomly people formed ‘bands’ on stage, picking from the songbook to play a couple of numbers. The first band played really well and I was heading for the door, when I thought why not give it a go you’re here now. So when the time came around I took my turn and you know what the moment I stood on stage my nerves left and I felt very at ease. Although I didn’t know the songs and was making up some of the chords it sounded pretty good. As the evening panned out I ended up playing 3 sets and had an absolute hoot getting to know people and jamming together.

What followed was 4 intense weeks getting to know and play with my new band mates, learning 12 songs, which I taught myself with the help of YouTube and my music teacher, 4 weekly rehearsals of 2 hours in proper recording studios with a music coach and great support from the rest of my band and my family.

As the night of the big gig approached I would wake up in the middle of the night feeling sick and anxious, guitar chords running through my head and all the songs muddled up. Terrified I would mess up, freeze or let the band down, I simply reminded myself this was about getting out of my comfort zone and having some fun on the way.

The day of the gig arrives and I am like a cat on a hot tin roof, last minute practice, checking my strings, packing and repacking my kit several times. I could hardly eat and felt dreadful – what was I thinking? Too late to back out now!

When the time came to leave for the gig and I felt myself drop into my body as my nerves and anxiousness melted away, my whole being became calm and I felt totally at ease knowing this was exactly what I needed to be doing and that everything would be just perfect.

It’s our turn to play, I remember standing on stage, guitar on shoulder, bright lights shining in my eyes and a microphone in my face. Knowing I had the support of friends and family in the crowd I struck the first chord of the opening number, my guitar rang loud and clear through the amps and we rocked out our 45 minute set, hardly missing a beat and enjoying every moment of it.

In what seemed like a matter of minutes the crowd where cheering and asking for more and I couldn’t wait to do it all over again . . . No more closet guitarist for me . . .

As a teenager I would dream of playing guitar with my favourite bands and last night my dream came true when I was asked to come up on stage and jam along with Michael Benhayon and Road Gloria at the Universal Medicine end of year celebration in front of 100’s of my friends both in the building and on broadcast live via webcast all over the world. Rock ‘n’ Roll!